This is Richard Merriman with some news about Jill. She passed away this past August. In early August she began to feel poorly and noticed that her skin had a jaundiced look. She was diagnosed with Pancreatic Cancer. She rejected the normal treatments as she felt they would only prolong death and impact her quality of life whatever time she had left. Luckily here in NM we have MAID (Medical Assist in Dying). This is the avenue she took - very gut-wrenching decision to have make - it takes a special type of courage to take that leap. 

Looking back I realize she took control of her story in being able to pass on your own terms, in your own time, with your dignity, surrounded by those you love is truly a gift. On August 21 she passed compassionately in our home with dignity and grace she led thru her 70 yrs and our 50 yrs of marriage.

I want to thank you for reaching out along with your kind remembrance of Jill. Unfortunately, per her wishes, she didn’t want a funeral or obit. Along with the kids we struggled with the request. However in the end we did as she wished. She was cremated and we made the following decision for her ashes: our son has 25 acres in the Sierra foothills of northern California. He will get a large water trough and this upcoming spring Jill’s ashes will be used to plant a fragrant coral colored rose, her favorite, as her memorial for the family but also as a reminder of the cycle of life. We met and fell in love at the U of Arizona (1975) - she was majoring in Biology and I in Archaeology. Looking back over these last couple of months I realize what archaeology taught me is that this precious gift of life is really about the time and the fragility of our existence - about the brevity of life/what endures and what we leave behind. I’ve got over 50 yrs of memories/bonds that are now in my sub conscience ready to excavated at a moments notice. 

Digging up the past in the present gives us a future - or as Faulkner said “the past is never past but always present.”